Showing posts with label disability. Show all posts
Showing posts with label disability. Show all posts

Scared about talks of cuts to Social Security, Medicare, and Medicaid


I was so lucky to get Social Security Disability only a few months after I applied. It never occurred to me that I might lose it, though I remember when Reagan cut disability in 1981 leaving people without any income whatsoever. I'd forgotten about it. Now the talks about budget cuts have me scared.

I only get $970 a month, but it really helps. I am supposed to be eligible for Medicare in March 2012. It would be so dreamy to have more of medical bills covered. I have not been able to go to the doctor as much as I've needed to this year, so thus far my out of pocket medical bills so far this year are a little over $4,000. I haven't seen my primary care physician for over a year. I've run out of meds for my dysautonomia because I have not seen the specialist since 11/09. I was due for a bunch of dental work earlier this year and cancelled that. Unfortunately I have a hard time getting motivated to go to the doctor or dentist when I have almost daily migraines. I keep putting off appointments.

I am expected to live on the equivalent of $5.16 an hour. And people want to cut that? I have had over 100 days so far this year when I've had a migraine. I left the house today for 2 hours and got a migraine as a result. This is normal for me. How can people expect me to work? It's already very hard to pay the bills. When the government talks about cutting benefits, people like me, and people much worse off, are the people it will affect. Please speak to your representatives about how you feel about this.

Visit Write Your Representative to find out how to contact your representatives.
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Devastated


OK I've been trying to figure out how to write about all that I've lost in the last weeks. Trying not to sound desperate and worthy of pity though the words I think describes me most are desperate and pitiful. It's not that I don't have so many blessings in my life. I have a wonderful husband who is more than I fear I deserve. I aspire to be worthy of him. At the same time, I tell myself that I am worthy and try to sit with the guilt. Not even wanting to understand why I feel guilty. Bleck. I have a supportive family, a few wonderful friends, and my wonderful kitties. But damnit, I feel awful sometimes. Devastated and desperate. Grasping onto anything that might mean life if worth living. I know I'm not supposed to feel this way--at the same time knowing there is no way I'm supposed to feel. See the problem? lol.

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